Education and Child Matters

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Sleep Overs

 

A sleepover, whether at your home or someone else’s home is exciting for your child. It is a big step for them. The only thing they can think about is being together with their friend, what they are going to do together and how they can get away with staying up all night.

For you as the parent, although you share in your child’s excitement, but you can also see many potential dangers and will probably be caught in that space most parents often find themselves in where you want to make your child happy, show them you trust them and want them to have fun but are anxious at taking the step to say yes.

WHAT EXACTLY IS A SLEEP OVER?

A sleep over is a social event where your child spends the night sleeping at their friends home or the other way round. There may be more than one child that participates in the sleep over.

Another name for a sleep over is a slumber party. 

AT WHAT AGE SHOULD YOU ALLOW YOUR CHILD TO HAVE A SLEEPOVER?

The general consensus is the minimum age a child can participate in a sleepover is between 7 – 9 years of age. It is for you as the parent(s) to make sure your child is ready and mature enough to handle it. 

WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO DO IF YOUR CHILD ASKS FOR A SLEEPOVER AT YOUR HOME (HOSTING A SLEEPOVER)?

  1. Have your child’s friend(s) over for an evening or afternoon first as a trial run to see if they get on and the other child(s) is comfortable at your home.
  2. You can have your child’s friend spend the evening, change into bed clothes and go home before bedtime. This will show you whether or not the children are ready for a sleepover.
  3. Have a parent tea date first. Contact the parent(s) of the child(s) wanting to have a sleepover at your place. Invite them for a cup of tea so you can get to know them and find out more about the family and if you are comfortable with them.
  4. Ask the parents of the child(s) having a sleepover at your house about allergies, medication, wetting the bed etc and if there are any other issues you should know about. If there are medical issues please make sure you can cope with looking after the child and tending to them.  
  5. If you have pets, check with the other parent(s) in case their child is allergic or is scared of any pets.

WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO DO IF YOUR CHILD ASKS FOR A SLEEPOVER AT THEIR FRIENDS HOME?

  1. Call the other parents and ask to go over and have a cup of tea with them. You need to do this to make sure your child is going to be staying over in a safe environment.
  2. You also need to ask who else is living in their home and who else will be on the premises the night your child will be potentially staying over.
  3. You need to ask how many other children will be staying over and ask for their parents telephone numbers and try and arrange to meet them.    
  4. Only if you are comfortable with the family and the accommodation should you agree to the sleepover.
  5. Ask if there are any pets on the premises and are they dangerous.

SOME POINTERS FOR A SUCCESSFUL SLEEPOVER AT YOUR HOME

  1. Lay the ground rules at the beginning about what the children can and cannot do including leaving the premises or not.
  2. Have drinks and food available.
  3. Have parental controls for internet access in place and switched on
  4. Have the contact details for all the parents involved on your phone in case you need to call them.
  5. Make sure you call the parents of each child as they arrive and keep the parents updated. Depending upon the age of the children, ask the children to call their parents before they sleep.
  6. Be ready to drop a child if they get home sick.
  7. Depending upon the age of the children make sure they are picked up at the end of the sleepover.  
  8. If you have more than one child then try and occupy your other children so they do not try and invade the ‘sleepover’.  
  9. Try the sleepover with one friend first rather than many friends so that you and your child do not get overwhelmed. 
  10. If the child(s) staying over has allergies or has to be administered medicine make sure you and all those in your home are aware. Make sure you know how to administer any medication. 
  11. Ask the other parent(s) to inform you about anything that disturbs or scares their child.

SOME POINTERS FOR A SUCCESSFUL SLEEPOVER AT YOUR CHILD’S FRIENDS HOME?

  1. Talk to your child about any concerns they may have concerning the sleepover. If they do then address them and remove their fears.
  2. Depending upon the age of your child drop off and pick them up.
  3. Help your child pack for their sleepover so they do not forget anything.
  4. Send some snacks with your child to share with their friend(s). 
  5. If your child is staying with their friend and wants you to call you before sleep then tell them to do so and take their call.
  6. Be ready to pick your child up if they get home sick. 
  7. If your child has any allergies and takes any medication please make sure the other parent(s) are aware and they know how and when to administer medication. 
  8. If your child is scared about anything then make sure the other parents are aware.
  9. If there is anything that helps relax your child then please let the other parent(s) know.
  10. If you don’t want your child to leave their home at any time please make that clear to the other parent(s).