Child Sexual Exploitation
WHAT IS CHILD SEXUAL EXPLOITATION?
Child sexual exploitation is when an individual takes advantage of their dominance, influence, power and perceived superior position over a child under 18 years of age to force, coerce, entice, blackmail, threaten, or scare them into engaging in any form of sexual activity.
The child can be given gifts, money, drugs, cigarettes, and alcohol in exchange for sexual activity. The child can also be given protection, status, perceived love and affection if they agree to perform the sexual activities asked of them.
The sexual activity can be with them or with others. It can be in person or online.
A child can comply with the requested sexual activities to safeguard their friends and family from harm.
The individual who is sexually exploiting the child could receive money, discounted drugs, alcohol or debt clearance in exchange for offering the child for sexual activity.
Child sexual exploitation is;
- A form of child abuse.
- There is a power imbalance between the individual sexually exploiting the child and the child.
- There is an exchange for the sexual activity either in favour of the child (where the child receives something) or in favour of the individual sexually exploiting the child (where they receive something).
- The sexual exploitation of the child is repeated. It is not a one off occurrence.
- There is a lack of freely given informed consent because a child under 16 years of age is considered unable to give consent for any form of sexual activity.
THE CHILD IS NOT AT FAULT
The law considers a child under 16 years of age unable to give consent to sexual activity. The child is not at fault if they engage in sexual activity. It is the child’s vulnerability to be abused that is at fault.
Often an abuser can take advantage of the fact a child is vulnerable and looking for love, affection, to be wanted or just alcohol and drugs. In exchange for receiving these all the child has to do is engage in sexual activity. The child is made to feel the exchange is fair but it is not. The child feels they are in control but they are not.
A child may have misplaced loyalty so will not admit or accept they are being exploited. They may not see themselves as a victim but they are. Shame may also play a part in a child not telling anyone.
In many cases the child can be threatened and in exchange for protection for them and their family they are made to engage in sexual activity.
WHAT CAN INCREASE A CHILD’S VULNERABILITY TO SEXUAL EXPLOITATION?
Child sexual exploitation can happen to any child. However, there are children with certain issues, problems and backgrounds that are more vulnerable and exploitable.
- A child from a disadvantaged background
- A looked after child (a child in care)
- A formerly looked after child
- A child missing from care.
- A runaway child.
- A child that has experienced domestic abuse, homelessness, and family breakdown.
- A child with a history of abuse, poverty, neglect, alcohol and drug abuse.
WHAT ARE SOME OF THE SIGNS THAT YOUR CHILD COULD BE SUFFERING FROM CHILD SEXUAL EXPLOITATION?
Your child may show many of signs:
- There are a series of unexplained absences from school.
- Your child does not inform you of where they are going on a consistent basis.
- They constantly go missing.
- Your child returns home constantly upset and dishevelled.
- They keep getting many calls or texts before leaving.
- Your child appears scared and anxious when receiving these calls and texts.
- Your child is withdrawn when they return home.
- They are intoxicated when they return home
- They have unexplained gifts and money
- They are being picked up from home by adults in cars.
- Bruises and bite marks on the body.
- Sexually transmitted diseases
- Constant secrecy about what they are doing.
AS A PARENT, HOW DO YOU HANDLE YOUR CHILD WHEN THEY INFORM YOU THEY HAVE BEEN SEXUALLY EXPLOITED?
It can be very shocking to learn that your child has been sexually exploited. Upon hearing the news you may be left upset, hurt, scared and distressed. Your world has suddenly turned upside down. You will have thousands of thoughts and questions racing around in your head. Be easy on yourself, don’t blame yourself and start thinking you could have been a better parent and start preparing yourself mentally to handle the situation with kindness, care and dignity. Follow the steps below.
Go hug your child and show them some love – Please remember prior to informing you that they have been sexually exploited, your child will have spent days terrified with the thought that they would have to face you. They will be traumatised themselves. Therefore, before dealing with your own reaction please give them a hug and reassure them that together they will get through this and that you are with them.
Your reaction can either calm your child down and keep the situation in hand. Your support will carry them through all the emotions, any health concerns and other issues they will face.
Let your child speak – Listen quietly and carefully to your child.
- Hold their hand if they are acceptable to it.
- Tell them they have done the right thing by informing you.
- Do not interrupt them as they speak.
- At this stage do not ask many questions. Let them get it all out.
- Try not to react. Stay calm.
- If your child sees you distressed they will close up
Inform your child they are not at fault – Your child needs to hear you believe that they are not at fault for what has happened. This will go a long way in them feeling that they must not punish themselves for what has happened.
Inform your child you believe them and are taking what they have said seriously – It is important that your child hears the words that you believe what they are saying. This will give them confidence to open up more. The words that you are going to take what they say seriously conveys that you are going to protect them and do something to stop what is happening to them.
Inform your child what you are going to do to keep them safe – Tell your child they are now safe and nobody is going to hurt them. You will take care of them and report the perpetrator(s) to the police.
HOW CAN A PARENT PREVENT THEIR CHILD FROM BEING SEXUALLY EXPLOITED?
Communicate with them from a young age regularly – Have an open and honest discussion with your child about sexual exploitation. Explain the harm it can do to their life.
Explain to your child sexual exploitation is wrong and dangerous. Once you have then support them if they are distressed and/or frightened – Be vigilant about how you can support them.
- If they are scared about an incident, inform the school, the police or your local authority child services.
- Spend time with them and ask if they would like you to walk with them when they go out.
- Give them a phone with credit so they can call you when they feel scared.
- They can also call 999 if they feel threatened.
- Make sure the route they choose to come home is safe.
- Go over scenarios where your child knows what to say if they get themselves into trouble or they come across someone who wants to harm them.
- Encourage them to walk away from the perpetrator.
Try to be observant and know what your child is up to – There are many things we as parents can do to ensure your child is protected.
- Know your child’s circle of friends and who they hang out with.
- Inform your child that their friends are welcome to hang out at your place if you are able to.
- Be aware of where your child goes after school and at weekends
- May sure they are not hiding dangerous things in their possessions.
- Be aware of what your child views on social media.
- Be aware of what your child is ordering online.
Try and build a positive trusting relationship with your child – Your child should be able to come to you and talk to you, share their fears or when they feel scared or threatened. They will do this if you are approachable, you do not react and do not take what they say personally. When your child comes and talks to you it is about them, how they feel and what is happening to them. It is not about your parenting. It isn’t an opportunity to blame yourself. Your child will approach you if you:
- Listen intently without interruption.
- Do not judge them
- Do not take what they say personally
- Understand their reasons
- Do not react in a negative manner
- Try and find a positive outcome for your child.
- Support them through the whole episode.
WHO DO YOU REPORT CHILD SEXUALLY EXPLOITATION TO?
There are many ways you can report child sexual exploitation:
You can contact the Police – You can dial 999 if a child is at immediate risk or a crime has been committed. Alternatively if there is no emergency you can dial 101 or file a report online.
LINK TO POLICE WEBSITE TO REPORT A CRIME ONLINE
You can contact Crimestoppers – You can report a crime anonymously to crimestoppers. Their telephone number is 0800 555 111.
LINK TO WEBSITE FOR CRIMESTOPPERS.
You can contact your local authority child services – You can contact your local authority child services and report child sexual exploitation.
LINK TO GOVERNMENT WEBSITE TO REPORT CHILD ABUSE TO A LOCAL COUNCIL
You can contact the NSPCC – You can contact the NSPCC and speak to them about your concerns and report child sexual exploitation. If the child is in danger they will call the police.
LINK TO WEBSITE FOR NSPCC – CONTACT US
Your child can contact CHILDLINE – If your child has suffered from sexual exploitation and they need to talk to someone, they can call childline.
LINK TO WEBSITE FOR CHILDLINE – CONTACT US
WHERE CAN YOU AS A PARENT TALK, GET HELP AND ADVICE?
You can contact NSPCC – If your child has suffered sexual exploitation you can contact the NSPCC and speak to them about your concerns. If the child is in danger they will call the police.
LINK TO WEBSITE FOR NSPCC – CONTACT US
You can contact FAMILY LIVES – Family lives was previously known as parentline. You can speak to them about your concerns that your child has suffered from sexual exploitation.
LINK TO WEBSITE FOR FAMILY LIVES – CONTACT US
You can contact your local authority child services – You can call them directly or look on their website to see if there are any local support groups where you can get support.
LINK TO GOVERNMENT WEBSITE TO FIND YOUR LOCAL AUTHORITY
You can contact VICTIM SUPPORT – Victim support is a charity that can help individuals who have been the victim of a crime. They have a free confidential support telephone line and live chat. They are independent of the police.
LINK TO WEBSITE FOR VICTIM SUPPORT – CONTACT US
You can contact other organisations –
LINK TO OUR L.I.P HELP GUIDE TO CONNECT WITH CHARITABLE ORGANISATIONS THAT COULD HELP YOU.
You can read our help guide for where you can reach out to get help if your child is a victim –
LINK TO OUR L.I.P HELP GUIDE FOR WHERE CAN YOU REACH OUT TO GET HELP IF YOUR CHILD IS A VICTIM
WHERE CAN YOUR CHILD TALK, GET HELP AND ADVICE?
Your child can contact CHILDLINE – If your child has suffered sexual exploitation and they need to talk to someone, they can call childline.