Education and Child Matters

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Revenge Porn

 

WHAT IS REVENGE PORN?

Revenge porn is the sharing, distribution, and showing of private sexual images and videos of another individual without their permission with the aim of making them suffer. 

LINK TO GOVERNMENT WEBPAGE FOR REVENGE PORN – THE FACTS

LINK TO GOVERNMENT WEBPAGE FOR REVENGE PORN – BE AWARE B4 YOU SHARE

WHAT EXACTLY DOES PRIVATE SEXUAL IMAGES AND VIDEOS MEAN WITH REGARDS TO REVENGE PORN?

This means images and videos of a sexual nature showing genitalia, the pubic region of the body and the performance of sexual acts (oral sex, masturbation, intercourse and penetration) which would not be shown in the public domain.  

It can also mean images of an individual posing in a provocative way or a video of an individual acting in a sexually suggestive manner. 

WHAT DOES THE LAW SAY ABOUT REVENGE PORN?

Under section 33 – 35 of the criminal justice and courts act 2015 and under the voyeurism act 2019 and under section 67A of the sexual offences act 2003, it is an offence to engage in revenge porn.

LINK TO GOVERNMENT WEBSITE FOR SECTION 33 – 35 OF THE CRIMINAL JUSTICE AND COURTS ACT 2015

LINK TO GOVERNMENT WEBSITE FOR VOYEURISM ACT 2019

LINK TO GOVERNMENT WEBSITE FOR SECTION 67A OF THE SEXUAL OFFENCES ACT 2003

WHAT IS THE PUNISHMENT IF SOMEONE IS FOUND GUILTY OF REVENGE PORN?

An individual can be sentenced to 2 years in prison. 

THIS IS PROBABLY HOW YOUR CHILD IS FEELING IF THEY HAVE BEEN THE VICTIM OF REVENGE PORN?

Revenge porn is a frightening experience for anyone let alone a child under 18 years of age. They have their whole life ahead of them and all of a sudden it seems they have lost control. 

A child may experience the following during this period:

  1. Shame
  2. Embarrassment
  3. Isolation
  4. Anxiety
  5. Scared

HOW YOU MAY FEEL WHEN YOUR CHILD INFORMS YOU THEY HAVE BEEN THE VICTIM OF REVENGE PORN AND HOW YOU CAN HANDLE THE SITUATION?

Your initial thought patterns – It is very easy to get angry when your child informs you that they have been the victim of revenge porn. The first thoughts that will overcome you will be:

  1. How stupid has my child been?
  2. Did they know no better?
  3. How could they have let this happen to them?

Your secondary thought patterns immediately after your initial ones – Your thoughts will turn to the consequences of what has happened:

  1. What will all the neighbours say?
  2. What will the family say?
  3. What will their future employers think?
  4. What about future relationships?

Your initial reaction in front of your child – You will probably go into shock the moment your child informs you they have been the victim of revenge porn. After the initial shock you may feel stressed and upset. The first thing you must do is focus on your child even though you are yourself distressed. You need to imagine how much worse your child is feeling? If you can, please do the following when your child informs you they have been the victim of revenge porn.

  1. Try to stay calm. 
  2. Do not shame them.
  3. Give your child a hug and shower them with care and comfort. They need it.
  4. Reassure them that they are not in this alone, you are with them and will help. 
  5. Reassure them you will stand by them no matter what.
  6. Give them confidence that together you and your child will get through this. 

What you shouldn’t do – Please try and not do the following:

  1. Scream and shout at your child.
  2. Blame them.
  3. Start telling friends and family. This will embarrass your child. 
  4. Making digs at your child.
  5. Start making it about you and what has happened to you.
  6. Start blaming yourself and your parenting. 

HOW TO REDUCE THE PROBABILITY OF REVENGE PORN HAPPENING TO YOUR CHILD?

Please read our L.I.P webpage on sexting which will give you so much guidance as a parent. Please click on the link below. 

LINK TO OUR L.I.P HELP GUIDE FOR SEXTING.

Sexting and revenge porn was not around when most parents were younger so it is an act which is very difficult to understand why a child would do it. Sexting and making videos of sexual acts can be due to peer pressure or the fact most children have normalised it in their mind due to what their friends are doing and because of social media.

Talking, communicating and educating your child about sexting and revenge porn starts now. When you speak with your child, be calm, friendly and try to understand that they are from a different generation who have grown up with the internet and social media dominating most of their lives. What is shocking to most parents is often normal to them. Have an open discussion where your child feels confident they can talk and communicate with you.

Your aim is the following:

  1. You as their parent(s) are not there to judge them but to mentor them.
  2. You are not there to shame them but to understand them.
  3. You are there to gain your child’s confidence so they can trust you to inform you of things.
  4. To make them aware of the consequences of sexting and revenge porn and how damaging it can be even though it may seem like a bit of harmless fun at the time.
  5. It is important to make your child understand that an image text or video once sent cannot be unsent. What seems like a bit of harmless fun now can have grave consequences later in life. 
  6. If anyone asks your child for an indecent image or video they must inform you first. You will not judge them or shame them.

You can also do the following:

  1. As a parent you should regularly monitor your child’s social media to see what images and videos are being shared.
  2. Explain the long term future consequences of images and videos getting into the wrong hands. Right now future employers, jobs, and future relationships are not on your child’s mind.
  3. Talk to your child that they are not allowed to share indecent images and videos of themselves, as well as their personal details online with anyone. If someone is asking then they should inform you first.
  4. Discuss online dangers and how sometimes a person in a chatroom asking for an image or video can be someone different. If someone asks for a naked or partly naked image or video your child must inform you.
  5. Explain that a boyfriend or girlfriend shouldn’t be pressuring your child to send naked or partly naked images of themselves as they can get into the wrong hands or accidently shared with the wrong people.

WHO CAN YOU REPORT REVENGE PORN TO?

There are many ways you can report revenge porn:

You can call the police

You can dial 999 if you or your child is at immediate risk or a crime has been committed. Alternatively if there is no emergency you can dial 101 or file a report online. 

LINK TO POLICE WEBSITE TO REPORT A CRIME ONLINE 

You can contact Crimestoppers – You can report a crime anonymously to crimestoppers. Their telephone number is 0800 555 111.

LINK TO WEBSITE FOR CRIMESTOPPERS.

You can visit the revenge porn helpline

LINK TO THE WEBSITE FOR REVENGE PORN HELPLINE

You can contact the Internet watch foundation – You can contact the internet watch foundation (anonymously if you wish). They are a charity that will help you remove indecent images and videos of your child from the internet.

LINK TO WEBSITE FOR INTERNET WATCH FOUNDATION

WHERE CAN YOU AS A PARENT TALK, GET HELP AND ADVICE?

You can contact NSPCC – If your child has suffered revenge porn you can contact the NSPCC and speak to them about your concerns. If the child is in danger, they will call the police. 

LINK TO WEBSITE FOR NSPCC – CONTACT US

You can contact FAMILY LIVES – Family lives was previously known as parentline.  You can speak to them about your concerns that your child has suffered from revenge porn. 

LINK TO WEBSITE FOR FAMILY LIVES – CONTACT US 

You can contact SUPPORTLINE – Supportline can provide confidential emotional support over the phone about revenge porn. Their helpline number is 01708 765 200. You can also email them.

LINK TO WEBSITE FOR SUPPORTLINE – CONTACT US

You can contact your local authority child services – You can call them directly or look on their website to see if there are any local support groups where you can get support.

LINK TO GOVERNMENT WEBSITE TO FIND YOUR LOCAL AUTHORITY

You can contact VICTIM SUPPORT – Victim support is a charity that can help individuals who have been the victim of a crime. They have a free confidential support telephone line and live chat. They are independent of the police.

LINK TO WEBSITE FOR VICTIM SUPPORT – CONTACT US 

You can contact other organisations – 

LINK TO OUR L.I.P HELP GUIDE TO CONNECT WITH CHARITABLE ORGANISATIONS THAT COULD HELP YOU.

You can read our help guide for where you can reach out to get help if your child is a victim – 

LINK TO OUR L.I.P HELP GUIDE FOR WHERE CAN YOU REACH OUT TO GET HELP IF YOUR CHILD IS A VICTIM 

WHERE CAN YOUR CHILD TALK, GET HELP AND ADVICE?

Your child can contact CHILDLINE – If your child has suffered from revenge porn and they need to talk to someone, they can call childline.

LINK TO WEBSITE FOR CHILDLINE – CONTACT US